The time has finally come to say goodbye... I'm sad to say you won't find any further updates on this blog...
Because it's moved!
From now on, all bloggy blogs will be blogged in my brand new bloggery at:
www.skahfee.com/blog
Oh, did I mention Skahfee Studios has an official website now? Check out www.skahfeestudios.com!
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Sunday, August 7, 2011
You sunk my entertainment industry!
Ok folks, I hope you won't mind if I stray a little off topic here. I've been working on a whole new home page for myself, and I have a bunch of new products that will be rolling out (as soon as I make them...), but today I want to talk about...
Battleship. As in "you sunk my..." The boardgame, now the movie! Coming soon to theaters near you!
Ok first off, if you haven't seen the trailer yet, go check it out before you read on, I'll let you form your own opinion before I beat you to death with mine.
Ok so, now can I say..... WHAT. THE. FUCK???
Look, Hollywood, I get that times are tough and every studio has properties that are huge before the movie is even released these days. Boy wizards, superheroes, book adaptations, comic adaptations, sequels, tv-to-movie, theme park rides. But, freakin' Battleship??
The obvious rebuttal, if you know me, is that I freakin' love the Clue movie from the 80s, so maybe Battleship will turn out well. And maybe it will.. this trailer actually looked OK before I knew what it was (and look, there's Erik and Hoyt from True Blood!) But here's the thing... this degrades and insults everybody involved: filmmakers, audience, studio, everyone. Two reasons why:
1) Nobody gives a fuck about a Battleship movie. I can see exactly where this idea came from, but it reeks. Studio execs see Transformers is hugely successful, and Thundercats is back on TV, and all these other properties that hold nostalgic value for Gen X and Y are taking off on the big and small screens, and they;re desperate to get their hands on another one, but do you imagine there is a single person on this planet who went "squeeeeee!" with joy when they heard there was a Battleship movie in the works? No. There wasn't. Not one. And I think the studio (I havent bothered to notice which it is) knows that. I think they are betting that name recognition ALONE will sell this flick, that their audience doesn't even have to LIKE the property, they just have to RECOGNIZE it to want to fork over their cash. I am hoping that they are wrong, that people are smarter than that. I guess we'll see.
2) THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH BATTLESHIP!!! You know why? Because there is not a single plot, character, or thematic element to Battleship. It's just about two fleets of ships duking it out with one another. And they didn't even get THAT right. Fleet of ships vs invading alien force is decidedly NOT Battleship. If anything, this looks like a sequel/re-make/"reimagining" of Battle LA from last year. If they remade Hunt for Red October or Das Boot, THAT would be closer to a Battleship movie than this.
3) Ok, I said two points, but this one is just hanging out there: You know, as well as I do, that some poor-ass actor is going to have to debase himself by saying the stupid line. You know the one. You know you do. Let's all say it together... "YOU SANK MY BATTLESHIP!" AAAAARRRGH!
Ok, I feel a little better now. Just don't get me started on that Hugh Jackman Rock Em Sock Em Robots abomination.
Battleship. As in "you sunk my..." The boardgame, now the movie! Coming soon to theaters near you!Ok first off, if you haven't seen the trailer yet, go check it out before you read on, I'll let you form your own opinion before I beat you to death with mine.
Ok so, now can I say..... WHAT. THE. FUCK???
Look, Hollywood, I get that times are tough and every studio has properties that are huge before the movie is even released these days. Boy wizards, superheroes, book adaptations, comic adaptations, sequels, tv-to-movie, theme park rides. But, freakin' Battleship??
The obvious rebuttal, if you know me, is that I freakin' love the Clue movie from the 80s, so maybe Battleship will turn out well. And maybe it will.. this trailer actually looked OK before I knew what it was (and look, there's Erik and Hoyt from True Blood!) But here's the thing... this degrades and insults everybody involved: filmmakers, audience, studio, everyone. Two reasons why:
1) Nobody gives a fuck about a Battleship movie. I can see exactly where this idea came from, but it reeks. Studio execs see Transformers is hugely successful, and Thundercats is back on TV, and all these other properties that hold nostalgic value for Gen X and Y are taking off on the big and small screens, and they;re desperate to get their hands on another one, but do you imagine there is a single person on this planet who went "squeeeeee!" with joy when they heard there was a Battleship movie in the works? No. There wasn't. Not one. And I think the studio (I havent bothered to notice which it is) knows that. I think they are betting that name recognition ALONE will sell this flick, that their audience doesn't even have to LIKE the property, they just have to RECOGNIZE it to want to fork over their cash. I am hoping that they are wrong, that people are smarter than that. I guess we'll see.
2) THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH BATTLESHIP!!! You know why? Because there is not a single plot, character, or thematic element to Battleship. It's just about two fleets of ships duking it out with one another. And they didn't even get THAT right. Fleet of ships vs invading alien force is decidedly NOT Battleship. If anything, this looks like a sequel/re-make/"reimagining" of Battle LA from last year. If they remade Hunt for Red October or Das Boot, THAT would be closer to a Battleship movie than this.
3) Ok, I said two points, but this one is just hanging out there: You know, as well as I do, that some poor-ass actor is going to have to debase himself by saying the stupid line. You know the one. You know you do. Let's all say it together... "YOU SANK MY BATTLESHIP!" AAAAARRRGH!
Ok, I feel a little better now. Just don't get me started on that Hugh Jackman Rock Em Sock Em Robots abomination.
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